This morning, I received a strange letter. The envelope carried the subtle scent of the sea, and the immaculate lettering on the front was clearly and carefully written in actual ink. The note inside read:
I am but a lowly squid, dashing through the water, and nomming what I can, even my own kind. While I have the freedom of the water, I have always wanted to fly! I see the flying fish and I get so jealous! Can you help?
Sad Sea Squid
PS: Do you think the girls would think it was cool if I flew?
I hadn’t expected to start fielding pleas for advice from disconcerted marine life. But who am I to refuse a cephalopod’s aeronautic dream? Since the letter contained no return address – and my efforts to get the post office to send a letter to the middle of the Pacific proved fruitless – I can only hope that the somber squid is able to read my response here.