Seriously Michael Bay, what the hell?

The theme from the animated (1986) Transformers film.

I had promised myself that I would not blog about Transformers 2. I knew it was going to be awful, but against my better judgment I went anyway. (Given that MST3K was one of my favorite shows, I figured I could at least have some fun riffing on it.) Now that I have seen it, though, I must break my promise.

Military fetishism, incomprehensible action sequences, sexism, racism, and gaping plot holes pervade big budget summer action movies (i.e. anything by Michael Bay, Roland Emmerich, &c.), but there was one scene in particular that left my mouth agape in disbelief. About halfway through the film our ragtag team of heroes stops by the National Air and Space Museum in Washington, D.C. to have a chat with a long-dormant Transformer. Fair enough. The robot duly wakes up and makes an exit out of a pair of closed hangar doors, but I was entirely unprepared for what was on the other side.

The robot and humans exit onto an airfield on a grassy, high-altitude plain set against a majestic mountain range. I just visited Washington a few months ago, and unless everything I learned about North American geography is a lie, you can’t see the Rocky Mountains from the middle of the nation’s capital! I could cope with the film’s poor dialogue, nonsensical plot, and infantile sense of humor, but that one little scene was the most baffling thing I have ever seen on the big screen.

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